Seattle Police Counter Colbert Cannabis Criticism

Cheech-orado and Washington-chong

SEATTLE, WA — Funny man Stephen Colbert last week criticized the Seattle Police Department for a cannabis education campaign involving free Doritos at Seattle Hempfest. Police had warned attendees to not drive stoned, but welcomed them to listen to Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon at a reasonable volume.

"What? Police should not be encouraging drug use," Colbert fumed. "And you can not listen to Dark Side of the Moon at a reasonable volume. You'll miss all the depth when the song 'Money' switches from 7/4 to 4/4 and Gilmour lays down a sick solo based on the pentatonic scale—is what I'm told by one of my editors."

The Seattle Police Department penned an open letter to the late night comedian, pointing out that they have enforced laws against unlicensed pot sales near Hempfest and against selling pot to minors—in a case that was picked up by federal prosecutors due to a legal quirk that entirely legalized marijuana for five months in Washington State.

"We’ve also made numerous attempts to better inform Seattle residents of the laws they voted for through our Marijwhatnow FAQ and Hempfest outreach," the police department wrote. "We even had the foresight to do so in a way that captured our audience’s attention before they went back to hashtagging their Tweets and Instagramming their lunch."

And regarding Dark Side of the Moon, says SPD, "We were simply drawing Hempfest attendees’ attention to the fact that they need not sustain any sort of auditory injury while embarking on Pink Floyd’s seminal 43-minute psychedelic voyage through human existence."

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